Hello, my name is Generation X, but you can call me “Generation I.” I am an Internet-addicted 20-something struggling to find a career path in this awkward post-college renewed adolescence. I got yelled at only 48 hours into my new job for playing on the Internet. I use the term “playing” because this is how the bosses of corporate America view the Internet--merely a toy we youngsters use to avoid real responsibility in the workplace. Well, I am here to tell you something very important, Head Honchos of the 9-to-5: the Internet is the only thing that keeps us Gen Xers behind your desks (and not behind a bar making 3 times what you pay us on tips in one shift).
Day One At New Job: I come in at 9 a.m. as requested only to find out that Boss Man does not normally show up at the office until 11. I read manuals for the next three and a half hours until finally being shown to my terminal.
Day Two At New Job: I come in at 8:30 a.m. as requested only to find out that Woman Training Me does not normally show up at the office until 11. I check my Hotmail account and just hang out until she arrives. She then takes an hour to check her Hotmail and various other personal accounts before starting to train me. I am scheduled until 5:30 p.m. but Woman Training Me leaves at 3:30. What to do with my last two hours???
Day Two, 4:40 p.m.: Boss Man sneaks up behind me in new office before I can close out Internet. States loudly in front of new coworkers: “Internet use is not allowed here. Otherwise we would have 15 people playing on the Internet and nobody working.”
Point taken. But not in the way he intended…
Note to self: Learn to minimize windows on my computer before Boss Man can see. Or get a trip wire across office doorjamb. I highly doubt he will acquiesce to wearing a bell collar.
Because here's the thing, Boss Man. Generation X stands for Xtremely fast, xtremely efficient, and xtremely prone to attention deficit disorder. Give me stuff to do, plenty of stuff…because the siren call of Internet Explorer is just too strong. On second thought, even with a To Do list a mile long, I will probably still be on the Internet. Because this is how I work. It is called 'multi-tasking' and I am famous for it. And yes, you will have that order before it is due. I am Generation I. That is how I roll.
