1) Curling. Also known by anyone outside of Canada as “that thing with the squeegees.” No, I haven’t actually curled before (is that the correct verb for “to play Curling”? I need to find a Canadian to ask). However, I have bowled in socks. Which is exactly the same as pushing a heavy object down a slick surface while trying not to split your pants.
2) Alpine Skiing. I was a proud member of S.A.R.S. (Schweitzer Alpine Racing School, not the deadly airborne disease) back in the day. Although I seem to remember less trophy winning and more hiding from my coaches in snow forts surrounded by penny candy wrappers.
3) Beer Pong. Okay, I realize this is not an Olympic-recognized sport (yet). But I am from Washington, and we Washingtonians excel at two things: Lasting through unending winters, and drinking.
So all of you national sponsors out there, send those bids on in. I would like to sport Reebok Pumps (hot in 1989, hotter in 2010), a neon Spyder one-piece, and a Budweiser logo on my helmet (good enough for SeaWorld, good enough for me).
U…
S...
A!
Spent Valentine’s at a table covered in conversation hearts, tactfully avoiding all the ones that said “luv”. Eavesdropped on the Siciliani seated next to us while sipping around the espresso beans stuck to the sugared side of my snifter. Roses, a bottle of red, a cute card. And all the while I'm thinking "good boy."